Speaking of Pansies

While hunting up long-stemmed pansies instead of the flat pansy-colored blobs on offer nowdays in most catalogs, I came across enough re-naming of varieties to make my head swim.
And enough ‘Marketers Gone Bad’ examples to make me laugh out loud.

First, the re-naming: Bingos are now Matrix, Baby Bingos are Panache & Panolas, and what’s left of the Baby Bingo seem to be re-appearing through the 4th dimension of advertising as Icicles. (Check out the color names, the photos–overly coincidental, to me).
And for the over-the-top, hard to digest medal winners: some Flamencos are now renamed Boleros–no, strike that, some fool is calling them Pansymonium (I kid you not: “Pansymonium Hot ChiliGolden Grape”, Pansy Pansymonium Flamenco Cabernet, etc.) The -monium folks are the same ones who thought up the Icicle advertising coup. Actually, most pansies will overwinter if fall planted; and there are many varieties that are winter hardy (Sky, Skyline, the Cornutas, Crowns, Swiss Giants, Panolas……) and not so spendy, and you don’t have to put up with the Mad Ave blather.
As in: Pansy Pandora Rainbow Stupendo, Pansy Pansymonium Bolero Rosy Ringled and Pansy Bolero Soft Light Azure Limonette.
Gack.